If You Know, You Know: The Sass & Spoons Collection

By Janet  | Wonderfully Wired

As someone who's been around for many decades, I certainly didn't grow up referring to "chaos goblins." Nobody pebbled me in the '80s or 90's — or if they did, we just called it being thoughtful.

But after my own late ADHD diagnosis, I did what a lot of us do: I went looking for my people. And I found them — on Reddit, in Facebook groups, in the corners of the internet where neurodivergent people actually talk to each other without a clinical framework attached. What I found there was a whole language I'd never heard before. Penguin pebbling. Doom piling. Spoon theory. Chaos goblins. Feral as a compliment.

At first, I was just amused. Then I started recognising myself in it. And then I thought: why is nobody doing anything with this?

So I took some of these ideas to the ND community online, got feedback, got encouragement, and started designing with the help of intelligent tech. The Sass & Spoons collection is one result — a set of designs that reflect the community's own language back to them, in artwork I hope is good enough to put on your wall.

Here's what's in it, and why.

Born to Pebble

Pebbling is a penguin thing. They find the perfect pebble and present it to the one they love. The neurodivergent community adopted it because it perfectly describes how many of us show affection — not with grand gestures or the right words at the right time, but by sending a link, a meme, a song. A small, carefully chosen thing that says I saw this and thought of you.

It's been called a communication deficit. I'd call it one of the most specific and attentive forms of love there is.

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Chaos Goblin's Unite

Seventeen browser tabs. Forgot why you walked into the kitchen. Can explain the complete history of something you discovered forty minutes ago. You know the one.

"Chaos goblin" gets used as self-deprecation, but I don't think it should be. It's a brain that runs hot, moves fast, and makes connections other people don't see. This artwork is deliberately loud — because this energy was never meant to be turned down.

→ Shop Happy Chaos Goblin and more

Doom Piling Is Art

Doom piling: when you accumulate piles of things — clothes, papers, books, bills — because your brain procrastinates, or can't decide where things go. The pile becomes a holding pattern and grows more daunting the taller it gets. Every neurodivergent person I've mentioned this to has the same response: wait, that has a name?

It does. And it's an executive function difference, not a character flaw. The magpie seemed the obvious choice — sitting proudly on its pile, entirely unapologetic. Because honestly, some of the most interesting people I know have the most interesting piles.

As an aside, even in my mature years, my bedroom is one big doom pile. I always say my entire room is a walk-in wardrobe - and besides, I believe tidiness is overrated :)

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Diving Down Rabbit Holes

You look up one thing. Three hours later, you're an expert in something completely unrelated, and you have no idea how you got there. Sound familiar?

This gets pathologised as being easily distracted. I'd describe it as an extraordinary curiosity-powered ability to follow a thread wherever it leads, with gusto. Most of the best things I've learned, I learned sideways — including the research that became my book ai-neuroadvantage.

→ Shop Rabbit Hole Diving Champion and more

Feral. By Choice.

There's a moment — often after diagnosis, often after years of performing the acceptable version of yourself — where you just stop. Stop apologising. Stop explaining. Stop trying to fit.

"Feral" in ND spaces isn't an insult. It's freedom. It's the decision to be the undomesticated version of yourself, on purpose. And that can feel incredibly liberating.

→ Shop Feral, By Choice and more

Unmasked. Unfettered. Unapologetic.

This is the quiet one in the collection. An otter floating on its back in still water.

Unmasking isn't one dramatic moment. It's a slow process of working out which parts of you are actually you, and which parts were performances you learned so early you forgot they were performances.

Masking is one of the most soul-sapping, energy-sucking, emotionally draining practices that neurodivergent people often feel obliged to adopt. When you are finally able to stop fighting your mind, maybe after a cathartic late diagnosis, the relief is glorious.

→ Shop Unmasked, Unfettered, Unapologetic and more

Why these pieces exist

Each of these behaviours — pebbling, doom piling, diving into rabbit holes, running feral and many others — has been framed by others as a problem at some point. Too messy. Too intense. Too much. Not right.

I don't buy it. I think they're just different ways of being in the world. Valid ones. And it's time the conversation reflected that.

The Sass & Spoons collection isn't trying to explain neurodivergence to anyone. It's for the people who already live it — who see "doom-piling is art" and feel a small, specific relief that someone finally said it out loud.

If you know, you know.

Browse the full Sass & Spoons collection →

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Janet is the founder of Wonderfully Wired and author of Ai-Neuroadvantage. She was late diagnosed ADHD following a 40+ years career in international business, and has spent the time since trying to understand — and celebrate — how neurodivergent minds actually work. "AI Neuroadvantage: The Brain Doubles Framework" is available on Amazon.